I only just now watched the 1999 film adaptation of Girl, Interrupted. I enjoyed it a lot. The characters were really awesome, like I would legitimately enjoy friends like them. Friends who belong in a late 1960s mental institution. They’re all so interesting and they have interesting behavior. Maybe it’s a bad sign that I want friends who are mentally unstable. I don’t know. Angelina Jolie plays a sociopath, which I have mixed feeling about because she’s a terrible person but sociopaths are really cool.
Psychiatric drugs are cool too. Like advertisements for drugs always warn about MAOIs, which are antidepressants that fuck up your drug metabolism. Also glaucoma, but I dunno why.
I volunteered through school to get involved with the “medical reserve corps” which is a bunch of students who are supposed to be ready to help in nebulous ways during bioterror attacks. Earlier this year we did a drill to repackage antibiotics in case of an anthrax attack and just today we did a drill for decontaminating postal workers during an anthrax attack. I roleplayed a postal worker exposed to anthrax. It was in an elementary school. They told us not to drink the water because it was full of lead. So yeah, guess those kids aren’t going to do very well.
“Ow, my lungs” — my impression of a postal worker exposed to anthrax.
This program has full-time staff I think, they probably have homeland security money.
So yeah it was a pretty good experience I guess.
In other news, when I was still in California I was playing with my tennis racket, which was pretty fucked up. The frame is warped and the carbon fiber is splintering, and I tapped it against my foot because people playing tennis sometimes do that. But I was indoors and not wearing shoes and a needle of carbon fiber splintered into my foot. I thought it was just a cut, but I felt something on the bottom of my foot just now and I pulled out five millimeters of carbon fiber. It didn’t even really hurt or anything. I’m glad I didn’t get it infected or anything. Maybe I have clean feet.
She just knocked on my door with an incoherent question about the stove. I didn’t really understand it through the door, so I opened it to address her more clearly. She couldn’t turn on the stove. She has a bachelor’s degree and she’s enrolled in a doctoral program, and she can’t fucking turn on the gas stove. So I go downstairs and get hit by the smell of gas. She just left the gas running without lighting it, and then just walked away.
I don’t have very many expectations of my roommates, but one of them does happen to be that they shouldn’t endanger my life. Also I’ve seen cats on Youtube that knew how to use a gas stove. She’s like too dumb to live.
One of the new roommates for next year moved in. She’s a year ahead of me in school, and I knew her because we had a project thing together. I didn’t know her that well. She’s Chinese, but the southern kind where they look like peasants, so basically she looks like a peasant and that’s not attractive. She’s kind of uptight. Like she keeps on talking about the parking situation when I’ve made it clear that I don’t care. Also she keeps on texting me so I’m being passive aggressive and responding really late. She’s real annoying because she puts too much information in a text and she sends multiple texts at a time.
She drives a Buick, and that doesn’t help her image as a peasant.
Today was the last day of my rotation. My preceptor told me she was giving me a failing grade for my rotation because I’m bad at consulting patients. The problem here is that I had no clue the rotation was graded or that I had to consult patients to pass. If I knew I would have actually done it instead of consistently referring people to the pharmacist because I hate consulting people. I wouldn’t necessarily say that I’m bad at it, but I hate explaining how tylenol works ten times a day. It’s always the dumb people have the most boring questions.
If I knew that I weren’t insulated from my actions, I would have actually tried. Moral hazard got me and it’s hard to believe. I guess that would make me a good investment banker or something.
Anyway, she called the office of experimental education and she’s trying to get me help or whatever. That might not be so bad because it might give me something to do this summer.
My preceptor is grade-A freak material. She owns two harps (she plays the harp at church). She’s from North Dakota and when I first met her I thought she was like 55 because she looked kinda old and she had rat’s nest hair. Hair that looks like a rat’s nest. Really salt and peppery and unkempt. But then she dyed her hair and she looked like 45, which is just about how old she is judging by when she registered as a pharmacist. She married a fat guy with a ponytail and five kids from a previous marriage, so basically we know that she was in her late thirties and she had to settle for literally anyone because she wasn’t attractive to begin with, so she had no chance as she aged.
I don’t usually have or remember dreams, but I remember this one because it was fucking weird. I had to stay at the hospital for reasons that are unclear. It didn’t look as much like a hospital as a high school, with buildings scattered everywhere. It was kind of naturey. I walked around, and the guy in the building next to mine was just living there and played video games a bunch and did odd jobs for the hospital.
Also working for the hospital was a lady who was a guest lecturer from school. I’ve only seen her like twice but she was in my dream. Anyway, my therapy was to lie in a vat of lukewarm water and I was supposed to do it a bunch but I kept getting out and walking around. I think my parents came to visit. That’s about it.
Today I almost lost control of my car. I was driving 60 in a 55, and the cars in front of me were going 40 but I didn’t notice because I watched a cop pull over some guy near an exit. Then I looked back, the car in front of my was really fucking close so I freaked out and swung into the other lane, overshot a little, and compensated successfully. That lane was mercifully empty so I could continue driving although my heart rate skyrocketed and I was freaked out the rest of the drive home.
Also I bought some white people rice and it tasted awful so I threw it away.