A tale of two teeth

Wisdom tooth pain is a dull ache that comes and goes in phases. Mine are positioned in such a way that the top ones are really impacted but can barely come out, although at an extremely oblique angle. The bottom ones are positioned pointing into the roots of my backmost molars, so that they never come out and they every so often push against that tooth, leading to that dull ache. Eventually the ache gets bad enough that one is compelled to ask one’s dentist for a referral to an oral surgeon and have the teeth out.

I’m writing this because apparently some people (like my 6’4 athletic nordic roommate) are genetically fit enough that they don’t ever have to have the surgery and their teeth will just grow into their well-defined masculine jaws, but I’ve had all mine out like a feeble untermensch. I’d have to wear a tooth-shaped patch in public if I were living in the Third Reich.

So I had my right-side teeth removed three years ago back in California. The oral surgeon was a bit better in California. He was an MD/DMD so everything was a bit better (small incisions, better stitches, faster/less painful IV placement etc.) But he cost like $1200 with $600 after insurance. The guy here is just a DDS (fun fact: DDS and DMD degrees are equivalent, just named differently based on tradition!) and he wasn’t as good, but he charged $800 before insurance and $250 after. I was surprised at how cheap it was.
Anyway, for anesthesia they both use propofol + fentanyl. Apparently it doesn’t happen to everyone, but I get anterograde amnesia from propofol (which is relatively rare, but I’m pretty sure I didn’t get midazolam which more commonly causes amnesia). Anyway, propofol is the closest thing I have to being drunk because I’m blacked out and act kind of weird.

So while I’m getting the IV in, the guy goes “you’re going to feel a little relaxed before you get sleepy.” And like ten seconds later I did feel really relaxed. I was like, “Oh, I really do feel relaxed.” It was a nice feeling.  That must have been the fentanyl, so now I kinda get why people do heroin. Then I blacked out so that’s when the propofol kicked in. Then I woke up in a bed-type thing afterwards and apparently I paid for the surgery with my debit card which I don’t remember. I remember being shown written prescriptions to fill. Aspie probably took care of that part.

Aspie was with me and we went to CVS to pick up my prescriptions. I remember playing with one of their old people canes. It was pink. Also I bought two things of soup and picked up a four-pack of red bull for Aspie. I don’t remember paying for them, but I did. He drank two of them there. I also remember sitting down next to the pharmacy to wait for my meds. I don’t ever remember handing them my insurance card but I do remember Aspie mentioning to the pharmacist that we were pharm students. They shorted me on my Vicodin, which I counted later that night. They gave me 12 instead of 20.

I don’t remember getting home but I remember lying down on the couch and sleeping there to sleep off the propofol. Aspie was still there, on his laptop, but I don’t remember anything about it. I do remember him talking to some of my roommates though. I woke up four hours later pretty refreshed, and my mouth didn’t hurt too bad but it was full of bloody gauze. The bleeding stopped, but started later that night when I moved my mouth a little and maybe popped a stitch and I ran out of gauze and had to use a paper towel, which worked after 30 mins.

I got blood all over the house.